03 May How To Stop Going Bachelor/Bachelorette Party Broke

A weekend in Vegas? Three days touring wine country in Napa? Ski weekend in the mountains? These are just a few bachelor parties I have been invited to and each trip would have cost over $1500. This is where we insert a money cliche like “cash doesn’t grow on trees” or whichever one is your favorite.

My bachelor party was a single night of tomfoolery out on the town…that I lived in. We had a ton of fun and the trip didn’t exactly break the bank. There was paintballing. Bar-hopping. Good food. Lots of memories and laughs and it cost us all around $200 for the day.

So why is it that so many guys and girls are opting for these completely extra, over-the-top bachelor and bachelorette parties? Should we blame movies and Hollywood?

The average bridal party in the United States is five people per side. The average age people get married around is in their late 20s. As we know, people in their 20s aren’t exactly financially secure so what is going on with these crazy weekends?

Some Pretty Bad Numbers And Food For Thought

Here’s the shocking stats of the day…ONE IN THREE people (that’s about 33%) have gone into debt just to attend a bachelor/bachelorette party. THAT’S CRAZY. That means statistically, you could be driving two of your closest friends into debt with your extended weekend party.

The average person spends $537 at a bach party!!! That too is crazy.

I don’t want to rain on anyone’s bach party parade, but here are some things you need to consider before you plan an elaborate weekend trip:

1. It’s likely not all of your invited friends can afford the trip
2. If someone can’t afford it, stats show people are going into debt instead of declining the trip (I’d probably be too embarrassed to admit I couldn’t afford the trip and wouldn’t want to miss out on the fun so I get this 100%)
3. Do you want to be responsible for driving your friends into debt?
4. Do you REALLY need an entire weekend out? If you do, can you atleast plan it in the city where most people live so they don’t have to pay for travel?
5. If you are a best man/maid of honor planning the bach party, remember that unless the bridal party is paying for the entire night for the person of honor, weddings are expensive and average about $34,000 per happy day. Don’t add more financial stress to the lovely couple’s budget just for the sake of overdoing it.

Keep It Epic…And Cheap

I am the king of parties. Okay, so maybe more like a really, cool prince of parties, and I know how to make them fun. I have been involved in over 20 bachelor parties so I have a decent resume on these matters.

One year, I was in SIX weddings and I was invited to an additional bachelor party. I had a monthly budget line for wedding stuff, no joke. Between buying/renting suits for the ceremonies, paying for hotels the weekend of the wedding and a wedding gift, adding a bachelor party to that really can be a financial burden.

More than 40% of bridal party members cited pre-wedding events as budget busters that required them to go into debt.

You can add games or checklists to the night to make things a bit more lively. What matters isn’t where you go, but the people that you are with. You have the braintrust of the internet to find things that are budget-friendly, memory making events. Get creative and take advantage of your resources to make it a night to remember!

How To Approach This

First off, you should not publicly complain. Voice your opinion, sure! But too many people forget that this isn’t about them. So I recommend the following steps to properly deal with the situation depending on your involvement for the event:

1. If you are an upcoming groom/bride with a bachelor party, make sure you or your best man/maid of honor (who traditionally plans it) are aware of a budget for the night so everyone can have fun without feeling financially burdened.
2. If you are responsible for planning the party, before you plan the trip, get a consensus from everyone invited what an acceptable budget for the night would be. When everyone agrees on an amount their willing to spend, plan accordingly.
3. If you are in a wedding party (or were just invited to a bach party) and are having trouble coming up with money to attend all of the events, you have to take care of yourself. Privately bring up your situation if you can’t attend the entire party to whoever is in charge of planning and try to work something out. If they are your friends, they should understand and be able to help organize things differently to accomodate you.
4. If you are determined not to bring up your financial situation and that the party is too expensive, do not complain! Simply bow out graciously of either part of the party or the whole thing.

These nights can be a source of drama and can ruin what should be a memorable night for the guest of honor. Reduce the chances of that happening by creating an environment where people don’t feel unfairly burdened.

It’s unlikely the bridal party all comes from a similar financial situation, so as wedding season approaches, let’s all remember that it’s just one party and most of us won’t remember much of it this time next year. Therefore, it’s not worth hurting yourself to go into debt for.

With that said, party on!